Source: Josh Willing (Pexels)
Hey everyone! Crinkle Cat here.
Normally I write about the ABDL community or share guides that might make someone’s day a little easier. This time feels different. This week I lost my father after a long illness.
You can try to prepare for losing a parent. We are supposed to outlive them. Still, when it happens, it feels surreal. There is deep sadness. Then comes a strange sense of relief knowing he is no longer suffering.
My father had a constant, warm presence in my life. I was always grateful for him, and I told him so whenever I could. He was, in many ways, my best friend. I am going to miss him very much.
What remains are his memories and the example he left behind.
What My Father Taught Me About Being a Dad
To me, he showed what real fatherhood looks like. He loved without conditions. He stayed supportive no matter what. When I had problems at school or at home, or when I argued with my mother, he was always there. He listened. He gave guidance. He created a safe space where the outside world could not reach us. We could simply talk and be together.
That kind of care left a deep mark on me.
How My Father’s Kindness Shaped Me as an ABDL Daddy
Being part of the ABDL community, I try to carry his style of fatherhood forward. I want to offer the same depth of care to the people I connect with. When littles look to me as a partner or protector — as their “daddy” — I work to give them freedom to be vulnerable inside a carefully built safe space.
People sometimes find me unusual. They have read my stories. They know I can be playful and flirtatious. When they step into my hotel room or personal space, they may expect something more dominant or intense. What they often get instead is someone who sits and listens. Someone ready for real conversation.
At BabyFurCon last year, I met people who simply needed space to feel safe. Those moments meant the most to me. It was not about the diapers or the teasing. It was about letting someone be vulnerable and feel comfortable in that vulnerability. That is the kind of environment my father carefully created for me. He built a foundation of safety. I try to build the same kind of foundation for others, brick by brick, the way he did.
Acceptance Gave Me Strength
I wrote recently that trauma is not required for ABDLs to feel valid. In my case, the opposite gave me strength. I had a father who accepted me for who I am. He gave his time so I could be open around friends — and sometimes strangers — in safe spaces. He let me decide how much of myself I wanted to share.
I owe my father a tremendous debt of gratitude. I hope to see him again one day. Until then, I will keep living by his example of what it means to be a dad.
I cannot wait to see everyone again and share the love he gave me. I cannot wait to pay it forward.
Thank you for reading. Take care of yourselves and the people you care about. And I can’t wait to see everyone again to share the love that he gave me. I cannot wait to pay it forward.